As you waltz down the aisle, say ‘I do’, and begin married life, the idea of divorce will be far from your mind. However, for many couples, things soon turn sour once the ring is placed on their finger. The person you fell in love with may begin showing negative personality traits, meaning you could end up realising that you’ve got hitched to a narcissist!
The good news is you don’t have to stick around. If you decide the marriage can no longer continue, there is always the option to divorce. Although, when dealing with a narcissist, we have to be honest and say things may not be plain sailing! To help you survive the divorce process and come out the other side with grace and a smile on your face, here are some tips that can help.
Get a Solicitor
When in the midst of a divorce with a difficult personality, an amicable settlement may be off the cards. This can be particularly true if your ex is exhibiting signs of narcissistic personality disorder or any other form of manipulation. Should you try and work things out with your narcissistic ex, this may end up making things worse. Narcissists can twist your words, take what you say out of context, and even worse, tell blatant lies. Therefore, you need to hire a specialist lawyer to handle your case. There are narcissist divorce solicitors like Harrogate Family Law who can help. They have helped hundreds of people in a similar situation to you by providing the best legal advice.
Talk to a Therapist
Whether you’ve been in your marriage for weeks, months, or many years, being around a narcissist for any amount of time can take its toll physically and mentally. You don’t have to suffer in silence. There are therapists you can speak to who have expertise in helping those suffering from narcissistic abuse. Having someone to open up to can take the weight off your shoulders and make divorce proceedings more bearable. A therapist can explain what a narcissist is, as well as signs you’re in a narcissistic relationship.
Mentally Prepare for Gaslighting
One manipulation tactic many narcissists use is gaslighting. This is used to gain powers and make others question their behaviours. Gaslighting involves telling blatant lies, denying they’ve ever done or said something wrong, as well as projecting their own thinking or actions onto you. Brushing up your knowledge on gaslighting will help you stay one step ahead.
Document Everything
Because your ex may employ some of the gaslighting methods mentioned above, make sure that any divorce-related communication is made in writing, particularly if you don’t have a solicitor. You must document everything, such as unacceptable behaviours. It’s wise to start a journal to keep your notes together. If you hire a solicitor, you can pass them on which can be used as evidence in your divorce hearing.
The severity of narcissistic behaviours will vary greatly from person to person. Although we don’t know your ex and your situation, the guide above should help in navigating your divorce and coming out the other end with your dignity intact.
